Saturday, December 12, 2009

Another lesson from God

This morning was a hard morning. After Troy wouldn't cooperate with mild sedation for his dental work, we decided he would have to be completely sedated. This morning I was nervous and, of course, in constant prayer, but still I was not prepared, and I don't think any parent can be. Through God's provision, Daniel was able to meet me there as he had the hardest job. He and Troy went into the room with the dentist and the anesthesiologist and Teague and I were just outside the room in a small play area. They tried to show Troy balloons and how they blow up in hopes that he would let them put the mask on his nose to breathe the fumes of medicine and to put him to sleep. I knew this wasn't going to go smooth from our previous visit, and sure enough he started to cry and scream. Daniel and the two doctors had to hold him down to get this accomplished. This process only took 30 seconds, but it was the longest 30 seconds of my life while my little boy is screaming "No, please stop, Daddy, Daddy". But, sure enough 30 seconds came and he was fine. The anesthesiologist got him all squared away and then the dentist did her work. The whole process went smoothly but in the midst of it I heard God speaking to me. I find myself responding to God through this trial as Troy did to the dental work. I am screaming and digging in my heals and asking Him to end this somehow. I don't understand why and what for, although that is not entirely true, as I see many miracles happening daily, yet I still want this to be over. Troy had to have this work done in order for him not to be in more pain in the future, he doesn't know that but Daniel and I do, and I know God is actually sparing me a future of heartache because I am choosing to submit, granted not everyday I want to, but I know only God sees the big picture and knows what is best for me and my family and I want His best. Even though today was tough on all of us I still hear God speaking and teaching me, so I am grateful He never leaves me, even when I am obstinate.

2 comments:

Brie said...

Wow that is sooo true! God showed me the same thing the other day when Mali was putting up a huge fight to wear cool weather clothes and it was 12 degrees.

Anonymous said...

Love it. Love the bath pictures of Teague too! Adorable.

Ugh...I am feeling the same as you right now. I am asking God why did Brittany have to die, and asking Him what will come of this.

Hang in there. It has been a big year for both of us. I have faith that God will reveal the answers to our questions in time. Love your family!